The Internet and Me

I missed out on the web 1.0 websites of old, Geocities and crazy MySpace websites, but I did grow up with 2008-2012 YouTube. I was there when Google+ was forced upon everyone who had a YouTube account; you were forced to pick a first and last name for your website, you weren't allowed to have a single name alias. I used my actual name for my old YouTube channel for my Source Filmmaker Team Fortress 2 animations, but looking back I think I could've come up with a first and last name alias, maybe even make fun of the forced last name by just putting Last Name, haha.

There's something about the old/indie web that scratches an itch nowhere else can. It's a ridiculous mess of random blogs, colorful gifs, blinkies, buttons, weird humor, chaotic graphic design, inconsistent design choices and layouts, and yet I can't get enough of it. Modern websites are boring, but you don't need me to tell you that. I used to use Instagram back in high school and early community college, about 2014-2016, but it got old after a while. I remember even back then people were upset at Instagram for not listening to feedback. "We just want chronological timelines!" the people asked. They had no idea that their favorite platform was about to get so, so much worse. I more recently tried checking out Instagram in recent times and it's NOTHING like what I remembered all those years ago. There's more to discover, yeah, but it's a mess that floats in an ocean of ads.

From 2017-2023 I used Twitter, but that was mostly because I really wanted to (at least try) to network with other game developers and gain interest in my game projects. It never went anywhere. It also stressed me out a lot, from angry posts that randomly get thrown into my timeline to infighting between people in the replies. Like 2016 Instagram, we all had no idea what we were in for. There's things going on to be mad about, absolutely, but I don't boot up Firefox to get pissed off, I surf the web to get inspired, to learn, to be challenged, to have a good time. I really slowed down on my Twitter usage around 2021 and I offically stopped postined to my Twitter after my final post on February 25th, 2023. I've been feeling better after I left. I still want to dive into those smaller/niche Discord server communities so I can actaully connect with fellow game developers. I think I'll eventually do that.

I only use YouTube on desktop with a ton of extensions like SponsorBlock and Unhook just to attempt to keep myself focused; no short form content (only stuff I'm actually subscribed for like Chikn Nuggit), no random recommended videos with an exhausting amount of negativity or clickbait ("Why everything is terrible", "Robbing My Wife's Boyfriend at 3am Challenge", "My pillow isn't fluffy enough and it's American society's fault: a documentry"). Sometimes I just wanna actually learn something cool or watch something because I actually looked it up. There are so many insanely good indie animation pilots and episodes but YouTube thinks I want to be upset instead. However, with the restrictions the extensions let me place upon my desktop YouTube experience, it's changed my muscle memory to actually want to watch stuff I subbed for or I sail the seas of content by searching for it myself.

I can't imagine myself logging into something like Facebook and Twitter and just scrolling without thinking these days. The closest to this is trying to find cool stuff on Pinterest but it's been a bit tough. Hilariously, I know people that preach how terrible social media is, "down with it I say!" they yell standing on their soapbox made from old PS2 cases and like-new Nintendo 64 game boxes, then 5 minutes later they'll just plop down and start scrolling mindlessly through Facebook Reels. I didn't wanna become that kinda guy, so when I'm bored on my phone, I try instead to find and listen to music I find interesting (maybe I'll make a website recommending them@1!!!!), I like to also explore the internet like mobile Neocities; it's rough and wack but it's a bit like looking through a microscope, carefully looking around at websites like they're lost artifacts. If I'm gonna watch YouTube on the phone, I try to be strict about avoiding short form content; there is a whole world of great short form videos, but there's galaxies of crap, so no thanks.